Can't let go

I had a nervous breakdown this morning. While I was taking a shower I thought about Vincent’s last minutes. I still remember every gruesome detail of that December morning. I have replayed it so many times in my head and yet each time I have to press my palms to my mouth to prevent a scream; and each time I become a mess.

When he died I thought I had lost my smile for good. I got it back but it wasn’t the same smile. I cry to honour you, my precious. I cry in hope tears will wash away the sorrow.