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“Should I stay or should I go?” I mean a concert of course, what else? I wish I didn't have to go alone but if there’s no other way… I’m sure Berlin will be lovely in June. I want to feel that rapturous again. I wonder if I still can. Right now nothing seems more important…or worthy.

Even my horoscope agrees: “It's officially time for you to forget about everything except that which gives you unadulterated joy.” 

I want the magic back. I know it’s there; and I only have to reach out.

Edit: Oh, the cold shower! All the hotels near the venue are sold out at the requested dates. ALL! What the…

Oh fuck.

OK, breathe. Not all is lost. Tomorrow is a new day, hopefully I’ll think of something. It’s not often I get excited but when I do don’t try to stand in my way.

One second I think I should know better than to act on an impulse, the next second I think that if I want it so badly then I should go for it because being sorry is way better than being regretful.
Duh.

I wish I wasn't going alone.

This swinging between Y and N makes me dizzy-but not in a good way.