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Parenthood surely changes people. That is not a theory, nor it is a perceptive assumption. It is a statement backed by direct observation on my friends-become-parents. Interesting, it seems that they can't be filed under more than one category at the same time, as if the moment they become parents they are no longer quite friends.

The smug ones are the scariest. As if becoming parents grants them an upgrade and makes them superior humans, superheros at the very least. They become self-assured to the point of arrogance with zero awareness of that change. And you have to tiptoe around them. Try to throw a hint and that will be the last of them you’ll ever see. With time that feels less and less of a loss.

I will never stop wondering why people want to have offsprings. Of course, I can make a list of possible reasons but the the thing is that I see no logic in any of it.

Which brings me to a conclusion I’ve been suspicious of all along - I am afraid of devotion. And not just afraid - I am terrified. I am terrified to let myself get attached to anyone I could lose eventually. Sometimes happiness comes down to not being hurt. It may not be much but it's more than nothing. Does that make sense? Apparently for me it does.

Am I alone because it is safer?